Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved but never been able to reach.

The world you desire can be won, it exists, it is possible, it is yours. 
Heyaa!! I know I haven't been on here in a long, LOONG time, ha, sorry about that. Loads of things have happened since last time I wrote- july 2012. Was on a family vacation to Miami after finishing up 2nd year of uni, woop woop. Parents got divorced at the end of september- went through in november, a couple of feeks after my mom and brother had moved out of the house. Went back to being a redhead. Started my 3rd and final year as a nursing student. Seen Tyler Hilton, Dion Roy, Evanescence AND The Used live here in London, was on front row for all of it ofcourse!! Christmas, new year back in Sweden. Went back to being blonde-haired. Got an A on my first level 6 essay (!!!!). Am on placement right now. And OH, gotten my first, second AND third tattoo- first in august, second and third in december when I was back in Sweden for the holidays, love 'em all!!
1st, the symbol stands for recovery from an eating disorder: its half a heart and half a womanly hip. And then it says "This Song Saved My Life", which is a song by Simple Plan as that song describes how I've always felt about SP eversince august 2000.
 2nd, says what the headline for this blog entry is. A quote by Ayn Rand, also heared in One Tree Hill, season 1, episode 2 at the end of the episode, Lucas Scott voiceover. The quote is so me, it describes me and my life... 
 3rd, dedicated to my mom ("Mamma" is Swedish and means "Mom"). Beacuse without my mom I wouldn't be here today, she has always supported and helped me, through everything, anything. I love her so incredibly much! 
I promise to be more active from now on, and I will try my best to stick by my promise!! 

When your world comes crashing down...

Think of all the days that are worth living for ...
Sorry its kinda shit, just threw some pics together in Paint, ha. ALL pictures copyright by ME.
These days, are the best days of my life. The days I experience true happiness.

I want to start by letting you know this...

...because of you my life has a purpose. You helped be who I am today, I see myself in every word you say. Sometimes it feels like nobody gets me, trapped in a world where everyone hates me. There's so much that I'm going through, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you.
I was broken , I was choking, I was lost. This Song saved my life. I was bleeding, stopped believing, could have died. This song saved my life. I was down, I was drowning but it came on just in time, this song saved my life.
Sometimes I feel like you've known me forever, you always know how to make me feel better. Because of you my dad and me are so much closer than we used to be. You're my escape when I'm stuck in a small town, I turn you up whenever I feel down, you let me know like no one else that it's ok to be myself .
I was broken , I was choking, I was lost. This Song saved my life. I was bleeding, stopped believing, could have died. This song saved my life. I was down, I was drowning but it came on just in time, this song saved my life.
You'll never know what it means to me that I'm not alone, that I'll never have to be.
I was broken , I was choking, I was lost. This Song saved my life. I was bleeding, stopped believing, could have died. This song saved my life. I was down, I was drowning but it came on just in time, this song saved my life.I was broken , I was choking, I was lost. This Song saved my life. I was bleeding, stopped believing, could have died. This song saved my life. I was down, I was drowning but it came on just in time, this song saved my life.

Simple Plan <3 august 2000 - june 2012 <3

25/01/06, 24/01/08, 25/01/08, 29/03/08, 31/10/08, 08/06/11, 01/05/12. Best days of my life. <3


'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable and life's like an hourglass, glued to the table.

No one can find the rewind button, girl. So cradle your head in your hands and breathe... Just breathe, oh breathe, just breathe...

Hellooo!! I know, I know, been really unactive on my blog, haha.

Welllll... I went to my 6th Simple Plan concert 1st of May (7th official Simple Plan day/occasion, if you know what I mean by that...) Qued for the entire day, had won Soundcheck via SPCrew so met them all (for the millionth time!!) and got front row on both the soundcheck and the actual gig. I've gotta say, it was probably the best Simple Plan gig so far!!! And yes, ofcourse I cried during it, duuh!! Almost 12 years as a fan, this band means so much to me- you have no idea- they've helped me in so many ways... They've kept me holding on. They've saved my life. Anyway, it was sooo beyond amazing!!! <3

Soundcheck baaaby ;) <3

Actual gig!!!!!!!! <3 more pics will be uploaded next time I blog, which I promise will be very soon!!

Nothing much excpet that has happened really, OHHH except for that my love Anna came to London to visit me for 10 days, that was absolutely amazing!! <3 Did some shopping (suprise suprise ;) haha), did the touristy bits and bobs and just generally had a really amazing time!!

Except for that.. placement, uni and more uni, haha. End of 2nd year is tough, I tell ya!

Anywayy not gonna bore ya!


If you want something to happen, make sure it happens and don't give up until you get there.


Never lie to someone who trusts you & never trust someone who lies to you.

I'm sorry for the lack of updates. Coming back to London of course had to mean drama. Just 1 and a half years left.... then I'm gonna move as far away as possible from this mirseble drama- to Australia. Cannot actually wait! To find happiness again. I bet I can here in London, I know I can, and probably will too, but its hard. But when have I ever said no to a challenge? ;)

Have been kinda bleuurgh this past few days, missing home, family and friends.

Good thing is, I'm starting a new diet tomorrow, been on that diet before. To get myself motivated again, on... just life itself. Yes, I belive that that'll help me. :).

I promise to update properly soon and I do apologise for the lack of updates.

My inspiration & motivation. Fashion, style, and just everything. She always has been. Mary-Kate Olsen. <3


Back in London...

Honestly I don't know how I feel about that... I hate saying goodbye, I get so emotional... but I'm really really hoping to go back to Sweden during easter holidays, so that'll be good and it's only like 3½-4 months left so hopefully that'll pass by quickly. And in 1½ years I'll be a qualified nurse, woop!!

And oh yes, happy 19th birthday to my little brother!!!! <3 I love you bro, you're the best brother anyone could ever ask for!!

Since being back here, I've spent the evening with my housemates watching TV, eating Swedish meatballs and lingonberryjam (brought it over with me, hehehehe). Denying the fact that we're starting university again tomorrow morning. Speaking of that I should probably try to sleep, I'm absolutely exhausted.

I'll update tomorrow, a more ... cheerful update hahaha.
I'm sorry, just being emotional due to everything that has happened in London and being back and just everything. But hey, new year, a new me. You won't ever recognize me now. Going back to Sweden did me good and gave me perspective on certain things. :).


All good things has come to an end...

why does that have to be so true? seriously, WHY?!?!
worked my last day at my old work today, saadface :( I'm going to miss you all, again. All the laughs, jokes and so on. But I WILL be back, hopefully around easter-time :D
Also, had a 60 min professional massage today, where I found out what the cause of my back agony is. Rotation of the back / pelvis, most probably due to previous falls in my youth (haha I sound so old saying that), and work related damage maybe, probably. So I'll need a chiropractor to click it/fix it/rotate it back to place... now that will hurt... but it needs to be done, as a future nurse I WILL need my back! so if I return to Sweden during easter I'll get that sorted.

Also I stayed up all night watching the Junior Worldchampions finals in ice hockey, Sweden vs Russia. Dammit it was a nailbiter but Sweden won in the end, sudden death about 10 mins in, up until that point the socre was 0-0. WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! :D

Nothing else is new, was supposed to go clubbing tonight but 1) my friend has fallen ill in fever and all of that and 2) I'm sooo exhausted and havent slept in over 35 hours. Easter, I tell ya ;)

I can't belive I'm flying back on Sunday, I don't want to leave :(
Anyhow I'm going to go and spend some time with my family now, while I can you know.

me at 6.30am this morning, after watching the game and one hour before work... no sleep at all, looking very... exhausted lol. and no I have no idea where that bruise on my wrist is from... probably from work by opening a carton too fast or something? hahaha.


Do you believe in something beautiful? Then get up and be it!



Staff meeting today with my old work, that I've worked at since being back here for christmas. plus activity (bowling) and dinner. lets just say I'm so not the worst at bowling anymore :P so much fun!! I've really missed the people, and I'll miss them again!
Its funny how London could turn from so fun and amazing to what I think of it now- I don't want to go back. a part of me does of course, as I've said earlier I'm fulfilling my dream in life: being a nurse, and I'm halfway there, and I'm not one to give up on something that I truly want.
Anyhow, have had a really amazing afternoon & night, eventhough the restaurant we went to wasn't the best.. we managed to have a laugh anyway!
Got home and watched Inception with my family, such a great movie! Although I was so exhausted that I fell asleep 3/4 into the movie, but I don't mind watching it again haha.
Working in the morning, my last day at work before I go back to London :(. And plus, leaving for an hour in the morning from work to go to a massage, my dad bought me a 60 minute massage session at this professional place because of my back problems. ... I should probably try to get some sleep, 2.30am and I'm going out clubbign after work tomorrow with a friend from work, it'll be amaaazing!!... but I prefer music & watching home&away hehehe. Love the australian dialect. I've decided that I'm off to australia to work when I qualify as a nurse, woop!!
Anyhow going to stop the rambling now, hahaha.


Never trust a pretty girl with an ugly secret...

Brand new episode of Pretty Little Liars, premiered in the US last night. Watched it today, all I can say is oh my god... How I love that tv show, its so capturing!! <3


Otherwhise today, I've been at work.. same old same old haha :P But it is fun, I've really missed my old work since moving to London, the people, and all the laughs!! Its almost as if I never even left, which is so amazing to come back to. Sometimes I wonder why I even moved... then again, I am fulfilling my dream right now; halfway through studies to be a nurse, loving it! I've evolved so much as a person since moving, its unbelivible. I've been through extreme happiness and extreme sadness- right now I don't honestly know how its going to be to go back to London. All I have to keep in mind is to think positive and that everything happens for a reason, as hard as it may be to stay positive, I'm gonna have to to make it through my studies... And on the bright side, when I'm done I'll just move to California, USA or somewhere in Australia and be happy again far far away from the misery thats happened in London... There are amazing memories too of course but its too painful being there and constantly being reminded of the misery that I've been through there... But, staying positive and hanging in there 1½ years left only, wooohoo.. :)

Anywayyy, some Home & Away is up (australian tv show), and sleep of course, another day at work tomorrow ;D


New Year- fresh starts.

Happy New Years everyone!!!!
Hope you all had as much of a brilliant night as I did!!! I basically partied with friends, went down to the castle to be there for midnight and saw the fireworks, then we went back to someones hotelroom to continue the party. I was so drunk that I left quite early, but still had a great night!!

Today, I've been hanging with the hangover from hell, haha. But heey, atleast I had a wonderful night, thank you ladies for that!! :) <3

click on the pictures to enlarge them :)

And, I've got a few new years resolutions. To quit nicotine all together, and to stop eating so much pizza (hahaha, hey atleast I've not gained weight at all, love that! lol). I'm gonna do it, it's for the best (quitting nicotine), just going to use up what I've got stocked up lol. It'll be great!! And then I've got a few personal resolutions that I'm going to go through with :)

Now, shower is waiting for me, I'm in at work tomorrow, haha. I'll probably update again later!


you know i wont say sorry, the pain has a bad reaction, a blend of fear and passion

... you know what its like to belive, it makes me wanna scream.


When life gives you lemons, take it with salt and tequila!

I am back, bitchees ;)
Well as I cannot remember my passwrod for my old blog(that I last wrote in september 2010), I, with the help of my wifey (Anna Wall for those of you whos's new to my blog) re-created my blog.
Soooo... I now live in London, UK, 2nd year student nurse and loving it!! But right now, chirstmas holiday and back in Sweden, at my old work where it all started, mahahha.
So uhm yea welcome to my new blog, I'll be updating about life and all that there is to it: friends, parties, fashion(shopping hahah), life as a student nurse and life in London.
And thank you to my darling Anna for fixing my header to me, its gorgeous!
Those of you who know me, knows what my life's been like since I moved to London so instead of a long boring rambling update about that, I'll continue on from today and onwards!

You know you love me

(hahahahahahahaha I just had to ;)...)

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